It’s kind of weird to me when you meet a bunch of people who already know each other, and you just walk in their place. They know their past & present; whatever they are saying doesn’t really make sense to you, but you are trying at least to engage. (you are not really into it) You are doing this because your friend who invited you and did a nice gesture. You should be thankful and don’t be dick.
I have no problem to chat with any stranger or start conversation but really don’t want it in this stage of life. Because you want to be comfortable with people you know and they know you. I think I’m lazy to share who I am, what I do this and that. I wish everyone shares their attendees list before any meetings, events or house parties. So you don’t have to ask those general questions. We will have more time for deep conversations.
Hi Aykut! Like you, I have one foot in North America and the other in Europe. I find that people who grew up in North America are more accustomed to the type of situation you describe. People who grew up in Europe and Eurasia find themselves confused in places like California. Americans seem so friendly, but then you never see them again. In Europe, it takes longer to get to know someone once you have reached adulthood. (Note: I was born in Florida, but I moved to Switzerland at age 51 because that's where most of my family is). It's good to acknowledge that you feel "lazy" at this point in your life, but it is utterly unreasonable to expect that "everyone shares their attendees list before any meetings, events or house parties." Really? Maybe if you are not interested in meeting new people, just graciously decline when you are invited. Simple enough.
I totally hear you!! Same feelings